Patrick and Tommy Frank, the two co-founders behind Float Factory, quit the corporate rat race with a simple mission in mind. They traded their business suits for bathing suits to eradicate the summer’s lamest pool toys.
“If your Instagram page needs a shot of novelty this season, we’ve got you covered,” says Patrick Frank. “Rather than the same tired pizza slices, swans, and unicorns people pull out each summer, try our Pool Punisher, Race Car, and Political Partay floats.”
Float Factory’s Pool Punishers dominate the summer waters
For anyone who owns a Pool Punisher from Float Factory, there will be no question as to who will be king, or queen, of the water this summer. These durable tanks may not stand up to battlefield artillery, but they can definitely dish it out and take it on the water. And since these floats can easily hold up to 300 lbs, you can rest assured that they’re not just for kids.
The Pool Punisher’s cannons can easily soak enemy combatants up to 50+ feet away, meaning no friend or family member is out of range. Before the battle, humanitarian protection status should definitely be granted to hamburgers and hotdogs on the grill. Amnesty may also be considered for civilian targets like Mom while she lounges in her poolside chair.
Admirals can propel their Pool Punishers toward each other and execute evasive maneuvers by churning the water with their feet Fred Flintstone-style. The weaponry provides a pump action water cannon, but best of all, their attachable cannons can easily pump water straight from the pool, beach, or lake so war can rage all day.
Race cars from Float Factory get summer days moving
Rather than sunbathing on a boring innertube, Float Factory lets swimmers zip around the water in Formula 1-inspired race cars available in three unique paint jobs, all of which are inspired by the most iconic teams in Formula One. These floats offer far more than just good looks, their multi-directional steering allows drivers to maneuver across the water quickly, and when you add their hydrofan motor, it will leave friends and family members in the dust of its wake.
Unlike the typical stripped-down Formula 1 racecars, these floats provide maximum comfort with back supports, armrests, and dual cup holders to ensure chill fun for multiple laps around the lake. The generously sized racers can carry a weight of up to 300 lbs and up to two drivers, so whether a pool party or lake vacation is on the calendar, it’s time to send the old inner tubes to the junkyard and pick up something new and exciting for the water.
Political Partay from Float Factory
No matter where you live in the United States, the country’s political debate has undoubtedly gotten too hot for many to handle. Thankfully, Float Factory designed a line of Political Partay inflatables to cool everyone’s rhetoric down.
Whether purchasing the Talking Trump Hunk or the Talking Biden Babe, the pool of candidates has never looked so good. Who wouldn’t want to pose for a photo shoot on the lap of their favorite political leader?
For the politically minded who prefer less talk and more action, Float Factory offers the Trump Tank and Biden Blaster float — each with an attachable water cannon — allowing swimmers to take out pent-up political aggression on their friends and family with opposing viewpoints. Instead of another futile waterside debate, they can nail them with high-powered 50-foot blasts of water.
Whether this summer’s water games include the Pool Punishers, Race Cars, or Political Partay floats from Float Factory, fun is in the future. While Patrick and Tommy Frank’s new company may not change the world, it will undoubtedly change the dog days of summer.
“These pool toys will leave you the center of attention in the water,” guarantees Frank. “Our high-quality inflatables do more they just float — they completely blow last year’s lame loungers out of the water! Who wants a boring old pool float when you can rock one of these all summer long?”
